Deciphering Al Davis Talk

The "Great Annual Raiders Coach Search" is over and the surprise coaching candidate, Tom Cable, was announced to a shocked world by Raiders Ruler, Al Davis. I love watching these bizarro press conferences. Because in watching, Al reminds me of ol' Uncle Harry who I was in charge (forced by guilt) of taking to the grocery store every month. You know Uncle Harry? The guy who complains to the cashier about the rising prices of milk and eggs and farts in the bulk section and blames the "barking spiders" hidden in the salted pistachio bin. Al is a lot like Uncle Harry, but instead of complaining about inflation, Al discusses football subjects. But he does it in his own language and it takes a trained ear to pick up on what he's truly saying. I pride myself, through years of listening to ol' Uncle Harry, in my ability to decipher Al Talk. "We have a hope that we can go and do the things we think we can." Okay, this means Al believes that Marcus Allen will apologize and come out of ... (link)