Roger Clemens Fallout: The Rocket's To-Do List

Roger Clemens is a very busy man.  And like most of us, he keeps on top of his daily activities by creating a “to-do” list.  Here's a look...     Rocket's To-Do's   -Pull my wife Debbie aside and rub her washboard abs.  Very nice.  Thanks, HGH!   -Text my buddy Andy Pettitte.  Wish him good luck this season.  Then thank him for providing the damaging deposition that allowed certain members of the Congressional committee to rip me a new one last week.    -Put flaming bag of poop on Henry Waxman’s doorstep.   -Invite Mike Wallace and TV crew over to watch me work out.  That way America can watch 60 Minutes and see that I’m “doing it the right way.”  Be sure to have ambulance standing by for the 89-year-old Mr. Wallace.  Just in case.   -Start lobbying Hall of Fame voters in an attempt to convince them they should still induct me into their beloved shrine.  ... (link)