Follow BallHype on Twitter
Hire Jim Essian Latest Blog Posts |
Add as Favorite
Claim Blog 
|
http://hirejimessian.com/ - __________________________________
hirejimessian.com —
First of all, I have HUGE NEWS! Jim
acquired Jeff Baker from the Rockies! I guess that’s
only huge if you assume the Aaron Miles era is over. I’m not completely convinced that it is. Anyhow, since most of you won’t be working tomorrow (meaning we probably won’t post ...
Sweet Uncle Lou’s Thursday Roundup: The ...
Sweet Uncle Lou’s Thursday Roundup: The ...
Comments
vote down
Bad Kermit
posted 2 days ago
Bad Kermit
posted 2 days ago
hirejimessian.com —
No, this is not an argument against Ron
Santo’s inclusion into the Hall of Fame. Only a
true idiot—or an insecure weirdo like Mike Schmidt —would make such an argument. Santo has long been deserving, and his exclusion is worthy of an absurdist drama. It is, however, this very debate that ...
The Case Against Ron Santo
The Case Against Ron Santo
hirejimessian.com —
Quick. What’s the dumbest thing you’ve ever thought?
Was it something like, “Man, The Matrix is really
deep,” or “Green Day’s music really speaks to me”? When you thought it, did you immediately feel shame and embarrassment for the idea even entering ...
Fixing the Cubs the Phil Rogers Way
Fixing the Cubs the Phil Rogers Way
hirejimessian.com —
Call me arrogant. Call me naive. Accuse me
of shaking my fist at the gods. But I
can’t help but smugly smile upon hearing the news that serial saving-children-from-burning-houses hero and future first ballot Hall of Famer Mark DeRosa has been dealt to the St. Louis Cardinals. Look, ...
Up Yours DeRosa, And Your Legion Of Fanboys In Chicago
Up Yours DeRosa, And Your Legion Of Fanboys In Chicago
hirejimessian.com —
The Cubs have somehow found a way to
sap the enjoyment even from their wins. In the
middle of today’s game, Milton Bradley threw a temper tantrum, and Lou Piniella brought him into the clubhouse, presumably to take him over his knee. Both guys have a reputation for being hotheads. As you ...
Friday Night Fukudome: Bradley vs. Piniella
Friday Night Fukudome: Bradley vs. Piniella
hirejimessian.com —
Originally, the title of this Roundup was going
to be something about Geovany Soto having the munchies
. But then Soto was upstaged by the death of the King of Pop , Michael Jackson. So, instead, it’s time for a tribute song. As always, tips, hints, and suggestions for the Roundup are ...
Sweet Uncle Lou’s Friday Roundup: The “Beat Us” ...
Sweet Uncle Lou’s Friday Roundup: The “Beat Us” ...
hirejimessian.com —
I like the All-Star Game. I think it’s
a terrific event, a nice break in the season,
and the only All-Star Game in the major sports about which anyone gives a damn. However, I am not a fan of the All-Star Game meaning anything more than mid-season entertainment. When Bud Selig made the ...
Let’s Help the NL Actually WIN an All-Star Game
Let’s Help the NL Actually WIN an All-Star Game
hirejimessian.com —
Last week, I was worried that Ryan Dempster
was developing Jason Marquis Disease. If you’re unfamiliar with
JMD, it occurs when you’re a starting pitcher who gives up just enough runs for your team to lose. So, if the Cubs score 8, you’re busy giving up 9. If they score 1, you ...
Do the Cubs Hate Ryan Dempster?
Do the Cubs Hate Ryan Dempster?
hirejimessian.com —
Now that Derrek Lee is no longer hitting
third in the lineup, he’s finally hitting like a
guy who should be hitting third in the lineup. He’s put up a .378/.440/.756 line in the past two weeks with 5 HR and 13 RBIs. His hitting streak is up to 18 games. He’s already reached ...
Welcome Back, Derrek Lee
Welcome Back, Derrek Lee
hirejimessian.com —
Have a great day, all you dads out
there. And all you non-dads have a great day,
too. Todd Van Poppel demands it. Share on Facebook
Happy Father’s Day
Happy Father’s Day
hirejimessian.com —
As you know, the Sun-Times ran its “
Whose Fans are Hotter ?” competition this week. There
are some ridiculous douche wrappers on both sides of town. But in the interest of fairness, I picked a couple of similar poses (minus the hardware, of course) to throw into the Fukudome. I had ...
Friday Night Fukudome: This Guy vs. That Guy
Friday Night Fukudome: This Guy vs. That Guy
hirejimessian.com —
Laugh it up, assholes. Just because I pass
on grass doesn’t mean you dorks aren’t still dorks.
There are lots of good things in this Roundup thanks, in part, to your tips . But mostly in part to me. Seriously, thanks for all the great tips. Keep them coming. Almost all of them were ...
Sweet Uncle Lou’s Friday “I Don’t Know if It’s a ...
Sweet Uncle Lou’s Friday “I Don’t Know if It’s a ...
hirejimessian.com —
T.J. Brown was kind enough to let me
know that David Kaplan took it upon himself to
“call me out” by pseudonym in whatever his night show is called on Wednesday. As usual, Kaplan was railing on Alfonso Soriano and was apparently mad at a comment on made on his latest post . ...
Full of Krap
Full of Krap
hirejimessian.com —
There are times when my mind wanders to
the question, “What is Kyle Farnsworth doing right now?”
Usually, I assume the answer is, “Pouring itching powder into David DeJesus’ jock and giving Mike Aviles a swirly.” But I would have been wrong yesterday. Because ...
Sometimes I Miss Kyle Farnsworth
Sometimes I Miss Kyle Farnsworth
hirejimessian.com —
If anyone is surprised about this , you
should punch said person in his giant Mongoloid head.
At this point does anyone even still care? I’m just going to assume that everyone who has ever been paid to play baseball has taken steroids. I’m also going to eagerly anticipate the day ...
SHOCKER! Sosa Did Steroids
SHOCKER! Sosa Did Steroids
hirejimessian.com —
I made the grievous mistake of watching about
twenty minutes of Monsters in the Morning: Primetime (They
seriously didn’t think to call it Monsters in the Evening ? Really?) last night. This morning, I woke up with blood leaking out of my left ear. Turns out my brain was so fucking mad ...
Monsters in My Nightmares
Monsters in My Nightmares
hirejimessian.com —
Listen, potential Muskboxers. If Carrie has told you
once, she’s told you a MILLION times. If you’re
going to keep asking her the same stupid questions over and over and over again, she is going to have NO CHOICE but to publish said questions ad nauseum. So stop doing it unless you ...
The Muskbox Gets FEISTY
The Muskbox Gets FEISTY
hirejimessian.com —
It’s a simple Friday Night Fukudome this week.
Simple in explanation, that is. Not in decision. VS.
Babies Puppies Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post's poll. Share on Facebook
Friday Night Fukudome: Babies vs. Puppies
Friday Night Fukudome: Babies vs. Puppies
hirejimessian.com —
So, I was driving along I-55 the other
day (wait for cheering to die down) when I
noticed this SUV in front of me that had, so help me God, the vanity license plate “POO MAN.” This was the best picture I could get without slamming into the median or, worse, into the POO MAN. But ...
Sweet Uncle Lou’s Friday Roundup: The “Making the ...
Sweet Uncle Lou’s Friday Roundup: The “Making the ...
