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Jim Hendry on Marquis Trade: Oh Shit, That’s Luis Vizcaino?
(Chicago, IL) - It’s been a busy offseason already for Chicago Cubs General Manager Jim Hendry. He’s had to make difficult decisions about Cubs free agents like Kerry Wood, and had to work out complex trades like the Mark DeRosa deal. Just yesterday, the Cubs announced that they had ...
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 Chicago Cubs Make Difficult New Years’ Resolutions
Chicago Cubs Make Difficult New Years’ Resolutions
(Chicago, IL) - 2009 is here, and with it comes joy, celebration, and of course, hope. The year is expected to be one full of hope, ushered in by, among other things, new President Barack Obama. When Obama won victory in November, he took it all in ...
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 Cubs Teammates Sad to See Kerry Wood and Mark DeRosa's Wives Leave
Cubs Teammates Sad to See Kerry Wood and Mark DeRosa's Wives Leave
Funny parody article about the real reason the Chicago Cubs had a tough time saying goodbye to Kerry Wood and Mark DeRosa: their hot wives.
Sammy Sosa Wants to Come Back, Teams Question His Playing Shape
(Miami, FL) - This offseason has already seen contracts dolled out for the older crew in MLB. Randy Johnson, 45, just signed with the Giants, and 46-year-old Jamie Moyer just got a two-year deal with the Phillies. So if old is the new young, why is 40-year-old former superstar slugger Sammy Sosa ...
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Bears Spare Fans Playoff Misery By Skipping Playoffs
(Houston, TX) - The Chicago Bears entered Sunday, the last week of the regular season, with an excellent chance of making the playoffs. But after a 31-24 loss to the Houston Texans, the Bears found themselves squarely on the outside of the playoff picture looking in. And that’s exactly ...
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Jim Hendry Asks for Jake Peavy for Christmas - Result is Humorous, Disasterous
(Chicago, IL) - It’s the most wonderful time of the year. Christmastime. It’s a time for carols, hot cocoa, candy canes, and Christmas parties. It’s also a time for giving and receiving thoughtful gifts that try to capture just what the other person was looking for. Chicago ...
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On Verge of Winless Season, Lions Face Mercury Morris Rap
(Detroit, MI) - It’s no secret that the city of Detroit has had a terrible year. Jobs are scare. The American automobile industry is on the verge of collapse. And the Detroit Lions are 0-15. With one more loss, the city of Detroit’s misery in 2008 will be complete. And the team will ...
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New Children’s Book “Where’s Soriano” Not Exactly This Year’s Tickle Me Elmo
(Chicago, IL) - Each year there is a special toy that every kid has to have for Christmas. They fly off the shelves leaving parents desperate and struggling to satisfy their child’s requests. This year, we’re not quite sure what that special item is. But we know what it’s not. ...
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Sorry Mike Fontenot, There’s No Way Those Are Megan Fox’s Panties
(Chicago, IL) - Mike Fontenot is a great hitter. A versatile fielder. A good teammate. A scrapper. A friend. A Chicago Cubs fan favorite. Yes, Mike Fontenot is many things. But a ladies man is not one of them. That’s why when the diminutive second baseman told teammates that he was dating ...
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Lacking Crazy in the Offense, Cubs Go After Milton Bradley
(Chicago, IL) - The 2008 hot stove is blazing, and although recent efforts to land Jake Peavy proved fruitless, the Chicago Cubs are still looking to add to their already loaded roster. The Cubs have excellent pitching - both powerful and crafty. And their offense offers a tremendous combination ...
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“We Got Wood” Tee Shirt Vendor Ponders His Future
(Chicago, IL) - From the first day he took the mound for the Chicago Cubs, fans knew Kerry Wood was special. Whether it was his blazing fastball, his sharp breaking slider, or his quiet confidence, there was just something about Kerry Wood. We all knew it, and we all knew that no matter what ...
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Derrick Rose on Stabbing Self: I just wanted be like Plax
(Chicago, IL) - The sports world’s history is full of baffling injury stories, from the silly to the downright unbelievable. Be it slipping in the shower, breaking ribs while sneezing, cracking a collarbone while loading deer meat, or suffering a man sprain when the hooker flinches, ...
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