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Michael Phelps is not basketball person
 
Here’s a bunch of things we decided to think while we were thinking about things: - We’re really glad that small blond American with the Russian name won the gold in the gymnastics thing lasterday. She is 5-2, 98 pounds. - We’re really unglad that there’s a new Star Wars movie out we don’t want to see. As many males in our age range can, we’re able to ...

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Dwight Howard is basketball person
 
Ball Don’t Lie has a bunch of stuff related to the new Vitamin Water ads for (a portion of) Team USA, and as you can see, Dwight Howard once again is all Superman’d up. We don’t know why this didn’t occur to use earlier, but isn’t it a little offensive that Dwight has kinda assumed this handle/theme while Shaq is still in the NBA? Shouldn’t he not only ...

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 Coach Mike is not basketball person
Coach Mike is not basketball person
(We’re watching Greece-USA at the moment. Do they not have weight rooms in Greece? All these players look like they should be on the 1982 Milwaukee Bucks.) The day after the Cavaliers actually made a move that could be defined as a legit ...
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 Mo Williams is Cavaliers person
Mo Williams is Cavaliers person
How in the world are the Danny Ferry haters going to bash him on this one? He gets rid of Damon Jones and Joe Smith for Mo Williams , a young scoring PG who is, quite frankly, perfect to put next to LeBron James. (We don’t mourn the loss of ...
Andre Iguodala is basketball person
 
Andre Igoudala, according to reports, has reached terms with the Seventy-Sixers, but the big news today is that MIL legitimate point guard Mo Williams could be going to the Cavaliers , if you’re into rumor-mongering. (Vin Diesel is teh gey.) As you all know, the CLE basketball team has been looking for a legitimate point guard since Terrell Brandon died, so having a real rumor aboot ...

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Angola is basketball people
 
The Angolan (sp?) coach is pretty sweet - his goal for this morning’s game against Team USA is to not lose by more than 40. We’re pretty sure the only movie they get in Angola (sp?) is Teen Wolf, and all he’s learned of coaching, he learned from that movie (sp?). In (sp?) other strange international basketball (sp?) news, Team Spain took the above picture (sp?), ...

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Mike Breen & Doug Collins are basketball persons
 
( This is a picture of Zack Morris from his new lawyer show on TNT. Who thought that hair looked lawyerly, we don’t know. He plays a DA - would the city let him look like that? Also, instead of the rest of the actors they hired, we would’ve used the entire cast of Saved By the Bell. Do you know the ratings that show would get? Good ratings, that’s what kind. ) Well, Team ...

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Kobe Bryant is el basketball persono 2009
 
Nobody is going to freak out aboot it because it’s not LeBron, but now Kobe says he’d go to Italy for $40-50M a year. He’s also much less vague with the reasoning/intentions, essentially saying one would have to be nuts to turn down the money. An always wise voice by the name of Mark Cuban has chimed in , and he thinks this is great for business. He doesn’t exactly ...

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2009 is basketball people
 
The above pic is a Batmobile some dude built in his garage from scratch . Wonder if it’s street-legal? The 08-09 NBA schedule is out , and it looks like the Cavaliers will open at Boston to kick off the NBA season. We’d say Lebron may get inspired by the raising of the banner, but the new Kevin Smith movie opens that Friday, and we’re pretty sure he’ll be ...

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 LeBron James is le basketball persono et la 2010
LeBron James is le basketball persono et la 2010
We told you he’d totally be into it - “sources close to LeBron” say he’d consider Euro offers in 2010 if they start at $50M per. Why? It’s good for the brand. Good for the brand. Good for the brand. And frankly, it ...
Tarence Kinsey is basketball person
 
We have no idea what this has to do with Converse, but we love this chick . Why? Because even though she’s fictional, she’s a hot, brunette, high-maintenance pain in the butt with moderate-to-high intelligence. This means she’s perfect for us, and our ideal woman. Since that was only marginally basketball related (at 10 years ago when Converse was still involved in ...

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Schlitz is basketball people
 
The biggest news in the NBA today (and maybe in NBA history) is that Schlitz beer is back . This was not only our maternal grandfather’s favorite beer, but also Jason Kidd’s. In addition to his love of Schlitz, Kidd sat the entire second half of Team USA’s victory against Communist Russia lasterday, which people are insisting on making into a big deal . Does anyone ...

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 Russia is Russian people
Russia is Russian people
USA looked kinda disjointed but ultimately beat Russia easily this morning - we think they look bored, and are ready for games that count. This is like watching pre-season NBA. Another neat thing happened last night - chubby-like-a-baby Celtics ...
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 Kobe Bryant is basketball person
Kobe Bryant is basketball person
"We'd shoot the dog before the snake . . ." Instant classic.
Announcer person is basketball person
 
Who is this guy doing the ESPN2 broadcasts on these Team USA games? We’ve never heard anyone who loves dunks so much. Every single time he’s like, “OH MY…!!! HOLY MOTHER OF…! A SLAM DUNKEROO!!!” In fact, just now as we typed this, LeBron (our once-and-again best friend) dunked on a breakaway and he goes, “OOOOOOH!!! A SEXY JAM!!!” Anyway, ...

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Paul Pierce is basketball person
 
So Paul Pierce says he’s the best basketball player in the world. This was spoken, explicitly in Italian, directly to JE Skeets’ Yahoo! blog , where he blogs for Yahoo!. Here’s the direct quote, directly from the blog, which is direct and a blog that is on the internet: Q: Is Kobe really the best player in the world? Pierce: I don’t think Kobe is the best ...

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USA-TURKEY is basketball people
 
(If you go to Toys R Us to buy things for your nieces, and the cashier is trying to unload 2-inch tall Hulk promo figurines for one cent, you have only one choice: you buy them all and figure out why later. And yes, if they’d had 200 of them, we would’ve bought them all.) As we react with amazement to Luol Deng’s ludicrous new Bulls contract and prep to liveblog the ...

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Ron Artest is basketball person
 
(Here is where the hilarious picture of Ron Artest doing things would go if we had any pictures OR if we were hilarious. Not both.) Well, SAC traded Ron Artest to the Rockets for nothing, if you count out Bobby Jackson, which we do. (Has he played for SAC before, or was that someone else? We can’t remember, and we forgot how to use the internet.) Ron on the Rockets means that like, ...

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Kwame Brown is basketball person
 
(On road, no PS, lame pictures.) Of all the basketball persons in all the Western lands, perhaps none is so reviled as the person of Kwame Brown. Why? Because a long with Darko Milicic, he stinks the most in relation to where he was drafted - at least in the last 8 years or so. Well, the Lasers have taken this into account, and signed Kwame to a two year deal . The second thing we ...

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Kennedy Myerson is basketball person
 
( We’re on the road and without PS or any of our other nice things our home computer has. Excuse this entire post. That means all 7 of you who are left. ) If you’re anything like us, you kind of marvel at the ability of the GS Warriors to give out ludicrous contract after ludicrous contract. It’s like they have some inbred, animalistic need to sign people like Ronny ...

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