Guaranteed Hilarity: A 1979 Take On How The NFL Would Look In 2000

• fastbreakblog

  +2

  What about space babes?   Everyone likes space babes.     Hey, what about Ricky Williams--he looks like he is from the future.

  Posted 3/24/2008 [reply] [flag]

• chone

  +3

  That Byron Donzis seems a little crazy, but women QB's? Not that far fetched.

  Posted 3/25/2008 [reply] [flag]

• Ben Q. Rock

  +2

  Female quarterbacks?! It must be the future.

  Posted 3/25/2008 [reply] [flag]

• RedBaron

  +2

  Donzis must have thought he was making year 3000 predictions. Otherwise, the guy is certifiable.

  Posted 3/25/2008 [reply] [flag]

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Links (12)

THE AFTER PARTY
Published 3/24/2008 by DCScrap at EPIC CARNIVAL
Ana Ivanovic inspires written tennis porn. (Intentional Foul) How the NFL will look in the year 2000, from 1979. (FanIQ) Dustin Pedroia wants Japan to "Shut Up!" (SbB) The Easter Bunny and MLB. (Home Run Derby) Kerry Wood named Cubs' closer; team reacts accordingly. (on 205th) Derek Jeter soaks up the sun and the booze. (Don Chavez) Pre-Season Predictions: Worst Baseball Manager! (Maxim) Nosebleed seat video of JD Drew's Japan slam. (Red Sox Monster) Those Davidson folk are crazy. (Brahsome) Caption a Dookie. (Loser with ...

DUMBEST. INVENTOR. EVER.
Published 3/24/2008 at With Leather
This week, sports geeks have shifted their attention from calculating VORP and masturbating to laminated pictures of Anna Kournikova to SI.com, which has opened up its archives of the last however many years.  The best catch reeled in so far is this doozy from 1979 (via FanIQ), in which idiots from '70s made their bold calculations for what football might look like in the year 2000.  And no one was a bigger idiot than Byron Donzis, an inventor whose opinion was sought because... uh... "I think you'll have a lot of women playing quarterback by 2000. For one thing, they have a higher threshold of pain." "The quarterback will ...

In The Future, All Kickers Will Have JETPACKS! [In The Year 2000 ...]
Published 3/24/2008 by Leitch at Deadspin
Pure blogging brilliance from 100 Percent Injury Rate over at FanIQ: While digging through the suddenly free Sports Illustrated archives, they've discovered a 1979 Frank Deford article about what the NFL will look like in the year 2000. It's as hilarious as you think it is. A few awesome highlights: "The coaches will begin to dress alike, and maybe there will be a machine out there doing the coach's job. It'll be second and four, the guy will punch a button on his chest and--wonk, wonk, wonk--he'll say, 'O.K., run off tackle.' " --John Madden, Former Coach, Oakland Raiders "I think you'll have a lot of women ...

Wavelinks
Published 3/24/2008 by MariusJanulisForThree at Troy Nunes Is An Absolute Magician
I'm as anti-Wave as anyone but this was actually a good job, Cuse fans...YouTube "The Top 25 Orangemen of the Idiot Era." Has Greg Robinson been around long enough to garner this? (we keed, we keed...)...Three Idiots Apropos of nothing, enjoy this footage of the Marshall Street celebration after the 2003 title game...YouTube Brian from Orange44 is back with a Podcast of Integrity...Orange44 SU fans are snatching up tickets for the SU-UMass game...Mike Waters How the NFLers of 1979 envisioned the NFL of 2000...FanIQIt's never too late to ...

NFL “Future”
Published 3/24/2008 by Matt Sussman at The Futon Report
What the NFL will be like eight years ago, according to 30 years ago. ◼ FanIQ

Searching the Vault
Published 3/25/2008 at FriarBall
While rummaging through some posts on the Internet, I came across a funny story in Sports Illustrated in 1979 about what fans thought the NFL would look like in 2000. And while this isn't an NFL blog, it did bring to my attention the fact that the SI vault is open and I decided to search for the "oldest" mention of the San Diego Padres in the magazine.

Very entertaining
Published 3/25/2008 by Chip's Moody Blues at Uwe Blog
Despite the fact I'd love to see him traded ASAP, I love that GM Jon Daniels is driving such a hard bargain for Marlon Byrd. **** Somewhat entertaining -- a 1979 point of view on the future of the NFL. **** This is significantly more entertaining -- 162 things we should know before baseball starts. **** Very entertaining -- 2004 fantasy baseball critique from McSweeneys. **** Probably the most entertaining thing to happen all week -- Pacman Jones to be on Mike Irvin's radio show. Seriously. Strippers not included.

NASCAR, terrifying the Eastern Establishment for decades now
Published 3/25/2008 at From the Marbles
For anybody who's a total sports geek, last Thursday was a landmark day on the web. Sports Illustrated opened its entire archive to the public, free of charge, and you could spend lifetimes digging through some of the best sportswriting ever. You can also check out the dubious accuracy of some SI predictions, as Fan IQ did yesterday with a 1979 article forecasting what football would look like in 2000. (Jet packs!) Or you could dig into the NASCAR side of things, and see that the more things change, the more they stay the same. To wit: "Brutes, Brawls and Boosters," a 1965 article about the Daytona 500, in which the obviously terrified ...

Futurists Are Morons
Published 3/25/2008 by Dave at Dave's Football Blog
So the gang over at 100% Injury Rate started diving into Sports Illustrated’s new SI Vault, an online archive of all the once-great magazine’s stories. They stumbled upon this gem of a Frank DeFord column from 1979 that described how the NFL would look in the year 2000. DeFord quotes heavily from some guy named Byron Donzis, a football fan/inventor who demonstrated the flak jacket to Houston Oilers quarterback Dan Pastorini by walking into the QB’s hospital room and having a friend whack Donzis in the chest with a baseball bat. Donzis’ 1979 view of football in the year 2000 was, to put it mildly, insane. ...

For The NFL, The Future Was Slightly Underwhelming
Published 3/25/2008 by Anthony Hall at MVN Outsider
Via FanIQ, SI’s vault brings us a classic article from 1979, in which NFL coaches and front office figures gave their predictions on how the league would look in the year 2000. Tom Flores, the coach of the Raiders at the time, gave a pretty accurate prediction — “Everything will become more specialized. On defense, you’ll get pass rushers and run defenders, first-down and third-down defensive ends. You’ll see relief quarterbacks,” said Flores. Aside from the “relief quarterbacks,” he perfectly envisioned the future state of the league. Dan Rooney’s prediction of “lighter equipment, more formfitting ...

Daily Links - Scheffler, Moss Ready to Go
Published 3/25/2008 by Kyle at BroncoTalk - Denver Broncos Blog and News Source
I’ve trying something new after receiving a few e-mails. Let me know if this slightly-altered structure makes it easier to navigate through the day’s news. Denver Broncos Tony Scheffler will get you pumped for next year in this interview. He’s taking a different approach (he’s not trying to gain weight) to his workouts, and is leaner and ready to be an elite tight end. [Rocky Mountain News] Jarvis Moss is working out in the tail end of his rehab, trying to earn a starting spot in the Broncos defensive line. [Denver Post/Photo ...

SI’s vault: Jordan’s spring training follies
Published 3/25/2008 by PostmanR at The Postmen // A Sports Blog // Chicago, IL.
All things told: Sports Illustrated’s Vault is freaking awesome. In a Web market so obsessed with throwing extra content and archives behind a paid wall, SI has given the masses their archives for free. Embrace the free flow of information, baby. Besides the gem FanIQ dug up on football in the year 2000 — there will be women quarterbacks! — there’s a ton of real cool stuff. It’s always pleasantly amusing reading features from yesterday. Today, the Vault highlights Michael Jordan’s spring training run with the White Sox back in March of ‘94.  Turns out, no one in MLB wanted him around. While the White ...