Miracle Masseuse Cures Da Meathook!

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What A Happy Ending!
Published 5/2/2008 by Chris Needham at Capitol Punishment
Nats Enquirer points to the good news! On his big day with his bobblehead (though with Pittsburgh in town, it could pass for a Jerome Bettis one), Dmitri has found the miracle cure for that aching back: a masseuse! "I was stunned," Bowden said. "All of a sudden, he has instant relief. She found the spot.... and his hips went through it." What a happy ending! Now he's on to Viera to start swinging the back, and if he's ever feeling back pain again, he knows he can pick up a copy of the city paper and peruse the ads in the back for his next miracle cure!

Meat Hook Really, Really Enjoys Massage
Published 5/2/2008 by Chris Mottram at Mr. Irrelevant
... we wouldn’t dare imply that anything beyond a simple massage went down with The Hook, but, well, Bowden’s sexual innuendos speak for themselves. It should be noted that she is officially our new favorite person for whatever it was she did to Dmitri. After the massage, he was able to take normal batting pratice and was hitting “with violence at contact” from both sides of the plate. Bless you, Tatiana. Update: This is embarrassing. Nationals Enquirer posted about this last night. Apologies.

The Miracle Masseuse [Blogdome]
Published 5/2/2008 by Leitch at Deadspin
• Dmitri Young is saved! [Nationals Enquirer] • Looking for the next Josh Hamilton. [Icy Hot Sensations] • Which Lakers fans are real? [The Play In CA] • NBA duos who split too soon. [Hoops Addict] • No Bill Laimbeer, please. [The Handsome Club] • Deron Williams can't take it anymore. [Basketball John] • That App State game is looking more ominous for LSU now. [AppFan] • What Braylon Edwards was thinking during "Costas NOW." [Clevescene] • ...

Nats Feature Oil Protesters, Dated Cover Bands, Massage Therapists
Published 6/25/2008 by Dan Steinberg at D.C. Sports Bog
... and corporate greed and oil sponsorship during the 7th inning stretch, or possibly to skip games and go to the zoo instead. (Green people are upset about Exxon sponsorship at Nationals Park, is the general idea, and protest is their form of release.) And speaking of release.... * Remember Tatiana Tchamouroff , the magical and apocryphal Team Massage Therapist responsible for Dmitri Young's feeling of "instant release" after she found what Jim Bowden called "the spot." Well, she's going to be a featured guest at the Nats' second annual Baseball 101 Clinic & Luncheon for ...