Sir, You Seem To Have Dropped Your Terrible Towel [Steely McDong]

Links (14)

A Use For Newfound Free Time
Published 4/21/2008 by Christmas Ape at D.C. Steeler Nation
... Getting a lineman in the first would give the Steelers a crack at one of the taller receivers they have been looking at for the second. Cedrick Wilson's tragic departure (more so for how it happened than the fact that it did) can be a sure blessing if they can find a reliable slot receiver through the draft, or maybe one who just doesn't take cell phone pics of his dong. ...

Deadspin Readers Really Love the D
Published 4/21/2008 by Stamos at Brahsome - Care To Get Nice?
... That said, we still frequent Deadspin, and found something strange yesterday. Their second most viewed post (and we’re talking over 10K people actually clicking the link to see the full post here) was one that casually contained a picture of Santonio Holmes showing off his LiveStrong bracelet. ...

Links for 2008-04-21 [del.icio.us]
Published 4/22/2008 at mgoblog
Michigan Destroys Little Brother in Sweep 27-6 was the last game. Just like football except way less close Notre Dame crotch spectacular nothing about this video surprises me in the least. Henne the draft's top QB? It ain't Matty Ice, yo Sir, You Seem To Have Dropped Your Terrible Towel Santonio Holmes, nekkid. Yeah, you can probably skip this one. Dog Race At Halftime of Michigan vs. Purdue not that exciting.

Blog-O-Rama: Marisa Millers Wows ‘em @ Wrigley
Published 4/22/2008 by jason at SPORTSbyBROOKS
... throw out the first pitch . Marisa Miller Cubs Wrigley Field • BASKETBAWFUL follows their nose, as Dirk Nowitzki’s pits are it . • SUPERSONIC SOUL digs up some old video of David Stern praising Seattle’s Key Arena . • This should go well - MONDESI’S HOUSE drinks in news that shirtless Steelers wonder Jeff Reed will be showing up at a minor league team’s Thirsty Thursday game . • Speaking of the Steelers, DEADSPIN averts their eyes, as Santonio Holmes drops his Terrible Towel . • RUMORS AND RANTS shows some love for these ...

PR Move of the Day
Published 4/22/2008 by Juice Staff at NFLJuice.com
... So, what we saw Tuesday on Deadspin was somewhat disturbing to us, maybe not to you or your girlfriend. Santonio Holmes is allegedly seen standing in a shower completely naked. And yes, you can see his dong. ...

A first-round mock draft. By Matt Millen*.
Published 4/25/2008 at Shutdown Corner
... Steelers these days, so you want to make sure you get a guy who's comfortable with that. You get a guy doing full frontal on a sports blog when he's not emotionally prepared to do so, and it can ruin his psyche for the rest of his career. That's how you end up with a wasted draft pick. ...

Tiara And Sash a Good Look for Drunken Kickers
Published 4/29/2008 by Christmas Ape at Kissing Suzy Kolber
... With Santonio Holmes matching his team record for pictures of his dick hitting the intarwebs, it was only a matter time before Steelers’ kicker Jeff Reed responded with more drunken debauchery. ...

Carrots derby carrots
Published 5/1/2008 by Flotsam Media at Flotsam - We'll tell you what to think
... Why my name Big Brown anyway? Named after Santonio Holmes. He's not hung like a horse, cuz I’m hung like a horse. Hear that, Eight Belles? Racing against Z Humor and Z Fortune, they brothers or something? They’re gonna team up and try to stop Big Brown, but not worried cuz I’m the fastest horsy in the stable. ...

DEAR BROOKLYN
Published 6/27/2008 by Simon (noreply@blogger.com) at Epic Carnival - Pop Culture, Sports, Celebrities, Babes, Rumors, Innuendo
... Eckstein: Ya he's an ugly dude and ya ayou probably weigh more than him, and ya the only way he's satisfying you in bed is with his tongue (the member matches the body). But the dude is a worker and with no skills at all he's better than douchie Roddick. Todd Bertuzzi: Hey some people say what he did was completely classless and perhaps a sin. I thought it was Natural Selection. Santonio Holmes: Did you see the snake I gave him? Burmese Pythons would be scared of that thing. Brett Myers: ...

Ward Makes Rookie RB’s Fumbles Uber Awkward
Published 8/26/2008 by Will Brinson at SPORTSbyBROOKS
... ball loose a time or two on Thursday, revving up his teammates. By the end of the week, 14 fumbles seems about right, and that should tire everyone out. Oh yeah, and surprisingly/awkwardly, Mendenhall’s not to thrilled about it:“It’s real tough, a little unrealistic if you ask me, with 80 guys, all the time, all day,” Mendenhall said. Jesus, man. Grow a pair and say you’re pumped about the challenge. Or that you hope Willie Parker dares to get near you. Or that if Santonio Holmes comes after you in the shower , you’ll run in fear. But don’t act like it’s unfair . Just quit ...

Hines & Ben Get Used To Frontrunning
Published 9/10/2008 by Christmas Ape at Kissing Suzy Kolber
Hines Ward: You know, othel leceivel, many peeperr say now that thell all injewlee to Tom Bladee and Shawne Mellyman that Steerel are team to beat in AFC. Santonio Holmes: [Admires own penis] … Ward: I say no be so hasty. As Supel Bore winning leceivel, I know season not won or rost in Week 1. Holmes: [Admires own penis] … Ward: You must take rong view. Think of season as tlek up gleat mountain. Some may ...

The Baker’s Dozen
Published 25 days ago by TheBaker at Rumors and Rants
... and Santonio “Don’t Get Me Confused with John Holmes a.k.a. Johnny Wadd” Holmes (right) just couldn’t help themselves. ...

SANTONIO PICKS HIS NOSE?
Published 21 days ago by Mike Florio at ProFootballTalk.com
... the “My Profile” feature. Sunday’s subject is Santonio Holmes.  Says Holmes of his worst habit:  “I quit biting my nails.  After my whole life, just went cold turkey.  If I could just stop picking my nose in public . . . .”  So that’s a +1 to Santonio for having a good sense of humor.  (Unless he was serious.  Then it’s a -5.) But we think that Holmes missed what truly was/is his worst habit.  It has something to do with allowing a person in possession of a camera into the bathroom while Santonio is in the shower .

JIM TRESSEL’S FRANK PACKAGE TALK
Published 9 days ago by Orson Swindle at EDSBS
... Remember: winning the Tressel Way means using the most effective package, not the biggest, meaning he never really thought Santonio Holmes was that essential to the offense, and that he’s talking about football…but could be talking about his penis at the same time. ...