Where Stealing Beer Is the Minor Offense

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HOLY SMOKING HELL SLOW DOWN GENTLEMEN
Published 7/28/2008 by Orson Swindle at EDSBS
... First, Virginia earns a total of five points for their unsuccessful foray into Charlottesville gay nightlife. First, there’s the crime of the mug shot hair, an atrocity. Second, if you’re going to steal something at a gay club, sweetie, make sure it’s someone’s heart, not a few beers from behind the bar. Third, if you’re going to attempt to outrun someone after stealing beer, make sure it’s not gay guys, because they go to the gym almost as often as football players, and are often more aerodynamic due to the body waxing. ...

UVA Players Have Gay Ol’ Time Stealing Bar’s Beer
Published 7/28/2008 by jason at SPORTSbyBROOKS
Two University of Virginia football players were arrested over the weekend for stealing beer from a Charlottesville nightclub. And you may say, “So whay? College kids are always finding ways to snag a free frosty brew, even if it means committing a little theft.” Virginia football players Gay Bar sign But this cavalier attempt by the Cavaliers players was a little more festive, as they abducted the alcohol while they were at a gay bar . Spencer Hall of THE SPORTING BLOG shares the news that junior offensive lineman Will Barker& redshirt freshman lineman Dave Roberts were ...

The Beer At Gay Bars Must Be Especially Good [Virginia Cavaliers]
Published 7/29/2008 by Rick Chandler at Deadspin
... up at Club 216 on Water Street at 3:45 Saturday morning. Police say both men admitted to stealing beer from a cooler at the nightclub. Both face larceny charges. Roberts, who is 19 years old, is also charged with being a minor in possession of alcohol and with using a fake ID. NBC-29 describes Club 216 as "a particularly well-known after-hours bar in Charlottesville," but a visit to their web site gives a clearer picture. Meanwhile, The Sporting Blog sheds some light as to why Barker and Roberts may have been there: Club ...