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Kanye West interrupts Josh Hamilton

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 9/16/2009 from twitpic.com

Kanye West doesn't think Josh Hamilton is the best Texas Ranger

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Maya Angelou’s predictions for the 2009-10 NFL Season

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 9/11/2009 from splog.nationallampoon.com

In order to fully prepare for the upcoming NFL season, I asked her to write a few words about the fate of a few of the teams. And here, you lucky Lampoon readers, are her predictions for the 2009-10 NFL Season,

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Riots erupt at ESPN offices after someone inadvertently comments–"Someday Terrell Owens will retire."

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 6/1/2009 from splog.nationallampoon.com

Pandemonium erupted this morning at the usually tranquil ESPN offices in Bristol, Connecticut, when an associate producer for ESPN's flagship "Sports Center" made a casual remark at the show's morning meeting that at some point "Terrell Owens was going to retire."

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Exclusive: John Madden's Resignation Letter to NBC Sports

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 4/16/2009 from bluemonkeydiscoparty.com

John Madden's Resignation Letter to NBC Sports

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When athletes fall for the oldest prank in the book

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 4/10/2009 from splog.nationallampoon.com

What happens when an athlete is the first one asleep on the team bus? It means it is prank time. I give you a gallery of professional athletes who have fallen prey to the cruel, yet hilarious prank of getting their face drawn on with Sharpies.

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Augusta National puts the "Child" back in "Child Labor"

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 4/10/2009 from splog.nationallampoon.com

Augusta National hires kids to caddy in an effort to save money at this year's Masters Tournament.

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Jay Cutler and Josh McDaniels talk of Matt Cassel, man tans, and Lionel Richie right before Jay quits the Broncos

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 3/17/2009 from splog.nationallampoon.com

A transcript of the conversation that occurred between new Bronco coach Josh McDaniels and Jay Cutler that caused Cutler to quit. It starts with Matt Cassel, moves to the Craigslist ad that the coach used to try and get rid of Cutler, then to man tans, Lionel Richie and ends with Matthew Stafford.

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Why Tom Brady getting married will save some guy a lot of pain

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 2/27/2009 from splog.nationallampoon.com

See, if Gisele and Brady were to break-up, you'd figure Gisele's next boyfriend would have pretty big shoes to fill. But, what would be worse than being her new beau? That role would have be filled by being the ex-boyfriend of whoever it is Tom Brady decided to date next. And this is why...

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An epic Mets collapse in three easy pictures

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 2/19/2009 from bluemonkeydiscoparty.com

The New York Mets have been a part of or had their hand in three of the most epic collapses in New York this year. Here are just three pictures that tell the entire story of those collapses.

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The Adam Morrison Hollywood Mustache Matchup‏

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 2/10/2009 from splog.nationallampoon.com

Other than being an utter bust, Morrison is best known for his late 70’s era porn stache. Now, while the stache may have been the toast of the town in a place like Charlotte, it’s going to have to work pretty damn hard to be to be tops in a place like LA. Here's a look at some of his competition.

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Phelps smoking pot should be the least of the drug concerns in pro sports

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 2/2/2009 from splog.nationallampoon.com

I think smoking weed will actually help Michael Phelp's reputation and this is why...

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Eddy Curry gets slapped with lawsuit (it’s the most exercise he’s gotten all year)

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 1/14/2009 from splog.nationallampoon.com

Some other of sordid stories and accusations about Eddy Curry that you may not have heard, which were sent to me by police stations, teammates and fast food establishments all around this great country.

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NFL Players Draw God

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 1/12/2009 from splog.nationallampoon.com

Last week, a video of Kurt Warner drawing his version of “God,” hit sports blogs all around the globe. I asked some other NFL stars to draw their own versions of God and Heaven for this article. For better or for worse, this is how some football players interpret God.

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A list of events that could sell more tickets than the 24 tickets sold for this year's Humanitarian Bowl‏

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 12/18/2008 from splog.nationallampoon.com

Including everything from a kissing booth featuring Carrot Top and the Crypt Keeper to a Carlos Mencia stand-up special...ok, I lied about that last one.

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The Last Strange Day of Plaxico Burress

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 12/5/2008 from splog.nationallampoon.com

Why won't Marvin Harrison go to the shooting range with me? Why do Raider players have it so good? Where do I hide this gun? The answers lie in a minute by minute account of Plax's last day as a New York Giant.

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Suggesting a bounty hunter to hurt Hines Ward...

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 10/24/2008 from bluemonkeydiscoparty.com

Earlier this week, Baltimore Defensive End Terrell Suggs let slip that the Raven's defensive unit has a "bounty" on the head of Hines Ward. If you really want to put out a bounty on someone, you should hire professionals to take care of it for you. Here are some bounty hunter options from ...

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'Million Dollar Man' Ted DiBiase Declares Bankruptcy

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 10/23/2008 from bluemonkeydiscoparty.com

You know that the economic crap has hit the fan when The Million Dollar Man Ted DiBiase has to pawn his Million Dollar Belt for a bottle Night Train.

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The 2008 Red Sox are the new Goonies‏

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 10/20/2008 from bluemonkeydiscoparty.com

Comparing the 'Never Say Die' Red Sox players to their counterparts in the film The Goonies. Featuring Manny Ramirez and David Ortiz as Chunk and Sloth.

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Big Brown writes a letter to PETA

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 10/16/2008 from bluemonkeydiscoparty.com

The famous horse states his case for why he doesn't think it's a good idea for him to be castrated and makes a point that Pauley Shore was never castrated and his races entertained 10x as many people as Bio Dome did.

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A day in the life of (the suspended) Plaxico Burress

bluemonkeydiscoparty bluemonkeydiscoparty posted 10/7/2008 from bluemonkeydiscoparty.com

See how the Giants reciever spends his days when he doesn't have to worry about silly things like playing football or practicing.

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